Annual County Fair

A step in the right direction

We have USCIS (immigration) approval.

Pirate's Cove

It's a super fun splash park in Denver. Tuesday afternoon we dropped dolly off with her grandpa and made our way there. We were invited as part of a Children's Hospital event for the CHIP (Children's Hospital Infectious Disease Department or something like that. The P comes from where?? I don't know. But CHIP sounds nicer than CHID, eh?) patients and their families. This is where we will be taking Meadow. Oh my goodness, the people there were INCREDIBLE. The employees are amazing, friendly, kind, capable and I know they do admirable, excellent work to advocate for the children others may shun. It was refreshing to meet several families who have already welcomed + children or are in process like we are and really get it. I didn't once feel the need to explain, why? They know why. Without me saying a word, they know. It was chilly, but the rain stayed away and we had a blast.
Of course, I did not take my camera into the water park with me so I don't have any shots of it.
What I did manage to capture was the hotel room we stayed in since the party ended at 9:00 pm and we thought we could make a mini vacation out of it.
Exciting photos. I know. Wednesday morning we went to the hotel pool before we headed back, which was fun too.

Here is Tyden riding his bike. Not to be outdone or left behind by his siblings, he was determined to learn and easy to teach. Jayla started his lessons by running behind him holding the seat just like mom or dad would do. Sweetness.
He's riding like a champ now. With the big 3 kids on their bikes and the 2 little ones in the double stroller, we can take real, long walks now. I have been waiting for this time to come for Y E A R S ;-)
These are the days. Worthy of rejoicing.

Signs I've been watching too much Bachelorette:

I've been saying this stuff.....to my husband of more than a decade.

I like you a lot and I think we have an absolutely amazing connection. I knew it immediately when you walked out of that limo toward me as I stood by in my angel white dress because I am a fine judge of character you know. There is this fantastic emotional chemistry between us and have I mentioned how gorgeous you are? I would like to have some meaningful conversation with you, in which I quiz you with my rapid-fire interrogation technique concerning your affection for me since I've got no time to waste as I sip champagne all day by the pool, but mostly I just want to make out. Do you think you're prepared for marriage and children? Because I know I am. (capital)R E A D Y. How do you feel about a proposal at the end of this? I feel good about it. Wicked good. I just have to make certain you feel as spectacularly about it as I do. Do you? Huh? Yes or no? Hey, guess what? I am moving to your home town! Have you had your minimum prerequisite heart break? Howzabout if you go ahead and express yourself to me in an articulate fashion, on demand, pledging your utmost devotion with genuine sincerity? Now. Right now. (Who cares about the other 15 dudes I'm dating?)
Did you come here for the right reasons? To find love? I am here for love....and marriage....and children.....and a proposal. You're not a country music singer, are you?

Bobby said he would be glad when this season is O V E R. Strange.

I honestly think Jillian is the coolest bachelorette ever. I vote for Ed : )

Time to Wait

These days, I am distracted. Completely dropped the ball on a couple of things I was supposed to do. Forgot altogether, which isn't really like me.
My mind is ever preoccupied as we wait for word about the boy. It is not easy.
Although quite challenging is this season, I'm continually aware of God redeeming this time for us. Every single day of July has been full of wondering, anticipation, curiosity. Will we get an answer about the child who has taken hold of our hearts right along with our beloved girl? As each business day draws to an end, a light crushing feeling comes over me, the realization that it will not be today....
Friday afternoons are the worst.
I rest in the knowledge that there is One who does know the answer, our future. He who sees the beginning from the end has got this all figured out and He cares for those little ones, knows every hair on their heads, every tear they cry. For now, I pray and trust in His plans for our lives, all 9 of us. As I try to use this time of anticipation thoughtfully to draw near to God, casting my cares upon Him, there remains a certain anxiousness that goes along with not knowing if The Boy will be our son. This adoption process has been full of torn emotion.

We received several WONDERFUL pictures this week from a couple who traveled to Ethiopia to pick up their baby boy in June and visited the orphanage where Meadow and the boy live. What a gift! She was able to describe the facility and snapped several photos of each of the children there. All the kids love to read the (1!) book they have. Can you believe that? We will remedy that when we go and are assembling items to take with us for the orphanage. As happy as I am about the prospect of picking up little Deutschlings from that home, I know leaving the many behind, those waiting for parents, will be devastating. Adoption is full of joy mingled with sorrow.
My Wait Time Heartache has got nothing on theirs.

Been doing other stuff....

Found some blog world folks who have adopted from the same orphanage we are. Been busy reading and reading and reading. Both about the place, and about their lives once they got home-the challenges, attachment issues, struggles, and slowly emerging great big joyous healing joys. It has been most interesting and helpful.
Still no news about the boy. Seems these things take a LONG time....
Had lots of friends over to play yesterday.(Thanks Kim!! It was great to see you all!)
There is plenty to talk about, pictures to post. But they will have to wait.
We're headed to the fair where the kids will surely ask repeatedly if they can consume their little sister's body weight in cotton candy. Should be fun ;-)

All dressed up and nowhere to go

It's good to be JOTSC

They're the only kids I know that have a sprinkler system installed in their trampoline. See the white cord? It's woven in and out of the net. Then, the water shoots out of the very top, all the way around. I don't know exactly how The Man did it. All I know is there is a lever on the hose where it plugs into the trampoline that adjusts the water pressure, high or low. You can even turn it completely off there, without having to go all the way to the hydrant. It's got to be one of the coolest thing ever for a kid. Clover doesn't stand a chance of staying upright with everyone jumping, so they get to sit for a while and let her have a turn running around.


The mastermind of the project, (with a girl around his neck) which will make story telling memories for Deutsch kids for years to come.

Now you see it.

Now you don't.

The boy is growing up. He's looking tall and lean and handsome. It's amazing how I spend every day with them, yet find myself caught off guard by how much they have changed. I can already envision the girlies going wild for this one in a couple of years.

I don't know why she won't comply?

For her writing assignment today, I asked Jayla to finish this sentence, then write a follow up paragraph: "I will live with my mother forever because....."

She's not doing it. To top it off, there is a whole big bunch of eye rolling and sighing and theatrical throwing of the head back in pure exasperation with her ridiculous maternal figure and stuff like that going on. I can not imagine what's got her so annoyed?

Earlier today:
Me: "Sometimes I feel like the luckiest person on earth." (Because oh my goodness I like myself some Deutsch kids and have a heart full of happy love for them.)

Jayla (a.k.a. the girl who will live with mommy forever): "Me too."

Me: "Really, like when?"

Her: "When I sit down to eat and I think about how much food we have and also when I look at the pictures of orphaned kids on the computer."

Awww, that's my baby sugar cube sweet cheeks, sniff sniff. I could just squeeze that dramatic young lady who wrote (in place of her excellent assignment) me a letter about how she simply COULD NOT live with me forever because she would like to have her own family (we could all live together!), although she loves me lots and lots since I am the best mom ever. She then flew it to me in paper airplane form.

Alright, fine. But I don't have to like it....and I don't know what else to do to convince her that living at home when you're all grown up is cool, so I'm rolling my eyes and looking up at the ceiling as I sigh.

*Blogging while I should be on break to fill the literal ache that waiting is producing and busyness with the to do list is not curing.*

Break Time

Good Monday morning.
I'm taking a week or so off to focus on some other important things that need attention. This includes both "to do" list items that I would love to ignore, but really should not, as well as working on some ultra-super-consistency with the kiddos.IF we hear anything about the boy, I'll break from my break to let you know! I don't have my expectations too high for word this week though. In the mean time, there is plenty to do (like praying for patience. Ha!)

Psalm 27:13-14 I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Hope you have a great week. See you soon....

Friday, again?

Where does the time go? Seems to be dragging on as we await news about the Ethiopian boy, yet flying by as the summer is already half over. Trying to truly enjoy this time with the weight of an ever present preoccupied mind is proving challenging. I just want to KNOW ALREADY, have an answer, deal with the decision of our agency, and move forward. It looks like what I want doesn't matter. Obviously, they're not rushing to ease my pain. I can not resist loving him, yet I know it could lead to complete heartbreak. Jayla ready to play a game *late* (9:00) at night when we pulled her out of bed for some quality time after the boys (and the 18 lb. big girl) were sleeping. Even in her groggy state she beat me good at Princess Memory. I love losing to that young lady. She'd better have a better memory than me!
If not, I'd worry....if I could remember to do it.....

No news

Will let you know as soon as we hear anything from our agency. For now, we've got nothing to share. These things apparently take time....

Clover had a well check appointment this week and at 18 months she weighed a whopping 18 pounds! Thought that was noteworthy. Yes we feed her! She's a delicate thing and a very very very pickey eater.

Every night when I'm tucking kids into bed Tyden says in a loud voice really fast, "you're the best mom in the whole world. Can you tell dad he's the best dad in the whole world?" Of course, I have to come out of their rooms and find dad to pass along the exciting news. I know one night he just won't say it anymore, like countless other parts of their childhood, it will simply vanish away and be replaced with some new behavior before that one runs its course and changes into something entirely different as well.....and I wanted to record it before my memory fades.

Thursday July 9th 2009. Since it won't be back again, we're going to enjoy it!

It is well with my soul

I was going to get the flower, those months ago when we last spoke ink.
But I realized I have no clue how many kids we could end up with.....so I decided the petal for each child was a no go.That song is The One for me. You know, The One?
The one that you love to blast in the car and sing at the top of your lungs, even if you're a terrible terrible vocalist.
The one that never ever gets old no matter how many times you listen to it.
The one that as soon as you heard it someplace you had to rush home and look it up so you could make sure you found a copy for yourself then you started to play on repeat for hours on end.
The one whose story was so touching the first time you learned it you could hardly believe it could be true.
The one that resonates with you in a way that you feel compelled to make it your own personal anthem.
The one that reminds you of Who God Is and helps you to be better for Him, faithfully bringing you back to your own smallness, your extremely limited capacity and His unfathomable sovereignty-that deep underneath any control you may try to claim, you really do want to relinquish it to He who is infinitely more capable to care for your life than you are and rest in assurance that He's got you.
The one that feels like yours.
I know I share it with many : ) But this is that song to me.
My favorite version is Selah's.

Ink

About The Song

Etched on my arm in Colorado Springs last night.

Mountain Retreat

The view from the balcony of the condo
Kids enjoying the sight....
.....and cookies
Dressed in red white and blue

Ready to swim at the rec center....for mere minutes before getting kicked out. Oh just kidding. Sort of. Fine Vacation Cuisine: Pizza Hut
The only picture of me from the weekend. Taken right after crying my eyes out watching My Sister's Keeper.
How incredibly relaxing it is to eat out with the children. Exactly why we mostly ate in ;-)
My movietime companion. She is a great date. Yes! She's (PG) 13! No! I don't mind if you question my parenting choices to take her to this movie! You can go ahead and yell at me right through your computer now if you wish. I'm fine with that! : )
Dolly snoozing in the closet
Playing at the park waiting for the fireworks show
We sang the National Anthem while watching fireworks from our bus because we're corny like that. Yeah, seriously. Kindof makes you want to make plans to hang out with the dorky Deutsch family next 4th of July, eh?

Independence Day~every year (as I get very old) I grow to appreciate this holiday more.
I don't know how many countries allow the adoption of HIV+ children. It's got me thinking that living in the land of the privileged and the free, we hold much hope in our hands. We have the opportunity to open them up to offer what God has graced us with to others. I want to not squander it with personal insatiability, nor take the responsibility of prosperity lightly. We came home to this:
The change of pace was the best part of the trip. I rarely knew what time it was. We ate when we were hungry, slept when we were tired, played in between, and breathed deeply as we took in the sights of God's magnificent creation. The kid's repeatedly said, "It's beautiful here." We were glad they noticed and grateful for the chance to get away from our normal day to day.

There were only 2 things on my Weekend Wish List we didn't accomplish:
1)Going on a hike
2)Getting a new tattoo
To be continued.....

Garden Salad

You know, salad from the garden. It's what's for dinner. For some really odd reason it makes me strangely happy to photograph my home grown vegetables. Lettuce is all that is ready, so here she is making her debut. Tada! It would appear I also enjoy assigning gender labels to leafy greens. I do that right before pouring delicious tangy dressing and...... shhh. She doesn't know yet what's about to happen.
Oh yes, the much anticipated, long awaited, high expectation exceeding, gloriously gorgeous mountain vacation after 100 years of not vacationing. I'll get to it. Right after I do the 100 loads of Magical & Most Excellent Vacation Laundry awaiting me. It could be a while ;-)

A Change in Scenery

We're headed to a condo in the mountains for the long weekend. (Really!)