Family photo 2013

Family photo 2013

Saturday, August 09, 2008

A remarkable mom, one that is beautiful both on the inside and out, sent me this quote that once helped her as they were preparing to welcome 2 children into their family by adoption. Since receiving it a few days ago, I have spent much time reflecting upon it and I wanted to place it here, because this realization is a step in our journey I want to recall. (I will be putting our first blog book together in September, at the end of my first year on-line journaling!)

"I remember during the adoption there were times when I was tempted
to feel crushed by the weight of trying to think of some scheme to
try to come up with the money to pay for it. But when I gave up
control and manipulation and trusted Jesus to provide for what He
had whispered to Brad and I then life seemed much easier. I also
felt that man-pleasing spirit rise up in me that wanted people to
approve of us and what we were doing. I could feel the pressure of
trying to persuade people we really had heard from God bear down on
me. When I crawled closer into my Father's arms and was content to
let the adoption be "our little secret" that no one else understood
then I felt light and free again."

The mom who wrote this had 5 young boys when she went to Liberia to adopt 4 little girls.

These words resonated with me. This is exactly where I have found myself recently. Wanting to have the people in our lives know. Know like I know.
I have wanted them to embrace this the way we have embraced it, to feel what we feel. I have wanted them to understand, they need not worry, this is God's doing. He will take care of Bob and myself. He will take care of JOTSC. He will strengthen us, provide for us, care for us. It's okay. This is a good thing.

I'm realizing that is not going to happen for everyone, which has certainly been a bit of a painful realization. It has frustrated me, and hurt me leaving me feeling that others think we could be making a big mistake. I have wanted to scream, No....No it's not a mistake. God has already begun to transform our lives, our thoughts, our hearts, by this. He is here, with us, right here. Can't you see it?

The answer for some will be no. We can not see it. And you know what? That's fine.
Not everyone has to see. Not everyone has to agree. Not everyone will know. It can be our little secret...and that is truly freeing indeed.


Holly said...

oooo - I love being a part of secrets ;-)

EM said...

That is beautiful. Hold your calling dear to your heart, like an unborn baby you haven't told anyone about yet. Something to cherish and to treasure, wholly yours.

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