Family photo 2013

Family photo 2013

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Life is like a bag of dark chocolates.

I write this as a reminder to myself, for those (daily, or hourly) times when I get annoyed at the seemingly endless infringements on my personal desires. Because, sometimes (hourly) I find myself feeling, but what about me? Does what I want matter, to anyone??? I want to be left alone to fold this laundry, I want to finish this phone conversation, I want to ask them to do something and have it done the first time, I want them to stop crying, I want them to not stand everywhere I am trying to walk, I want them to buckle up when we get in the car without being reminded, I want to get through a day and still have enough mental stamina to read before bed, I want to cook dinner without 1,000 interruptions. I want, I want, I want. What about what I want?

We bought a large bag of Ghirardelli Dark Chocolate Squares at Costco....because you know, dark chocolate is practically a health food. (I could not in good conscience withhold such a vital food group, cocoa, in all it's antioxidant splendor from my family.) It has 4 flavors. I always eat the one with the white mint filling. Jayla recently commented, "the green one is mom's favorite."
I laughed.
"Not really, actually my favorite would be the one with caramel filling."
She asked, "then why don't you ever eat those?"
"Because it's also everyone else's favorite, so I let you have it and I eat the kind no one likes." (I know, the heavy burden I bear.)

Truth be told: It will be bittersweet (no pun intended :) for me when I have an entire bag of chocolates to myself....when there are no interruptions, when I can have what I want, when I want it, with no one here to protest.

I wouldn't trade this moment in time, in all it's white mint glory for anything in the world.

This is what I want.
If I did not have this, I would yearn for it.
I want my home, full of people.
Full of people who like dark chocolate carmel squares.
Let me remember each day, in those times when I selfishly want what I want....that these people are only passing through, and soon enough they will be on their way, and I will remember the days when they ate all my favorite chocolates (and when they stood right in my way, and when they cried, and when my life was full of interruptions) and I will smile to myself, knowing I had exactly what I wanted.


Courtney said...

"I want them to not stand everywhere I am trying to walk" - SO TRUE!

totally cried when i read this post...actually KEPT crying with how my day is going. but thanks for this.

Sandy said...

You're so good at this... I just love this post.

Katy said...

I love this post. It's beautiful.

Holly said...

so precious and the cry of every mom's heart

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