Family photo 2013

Family photo 2013

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

Am-biv-a-lence

1. The coexistence of opposing attitudes or feelings, such as love and hate, toward a person, object, or idea.
2. Uncertainty or indecisiveness as to which course to follow.

They say this is the first social media Presidential election, highlighting the powerful effect and impact facebook, twitter, and the like has had on voters in the 2012 election. Reading the posts, articles and updates leading up to today, I have no doubt it is true. Like it or not, social media has given us all a forum, an outlet, a voice in which to share our political thoughts and opinions with our friends and acquaintances, if we choose to use it.

Formerly a pretty big fan of politics, at least during election time, I personally have lost most of my zealousness for all things political, seeing them as just that, political. Full of rhetoric and agendas the general populace will never be privy to, driven by lobbyist with insatiable self interest and unquenchable pocketbooks. Money, money, money. It's what makes the corporate, political world go round. Although I do find it quite interesting to hear how and why folks arrive at their convictions, and love a good conversation about nearly any topic at all, I don't feel a deep burning desire one way or the other, to see either candidate win. I do have my leanings, yes. Most certainly. But, I often question the validity of them. Only God can see the big picture. In my small world smack dab in the center of middle classdom, I lack scope. Hugely. Never far from my mind is the idea that if I were born into upper class, I would likely remain upper class, with an entirely different set of views and ideals than those I currently maintain. If I were born into a low socioeconomic status, I would likely remain there, with an entirely different set of views and ideals than those I currently maintain. I tend to believe such a great deal of our lives are subject to our given lot, although escapable, narrowly so, and not without tremendous effort, and possibly a generous dose of being at the right place at the right time with the right opportunities.

Recently, the kids and I have been reading about the birth of the constitution for their history and geography class (in which I am receiving an education too!). As I learn about the tremendous squabbles and significant disagreement between our earliest members of government that took place in drawing the constitution itself, I can't help but wonder if men and women arguing over political stance, each asserting their own opinion is right and true, is an age old predicament we human kind will subject ourselves to until time is no more. History is stunningly repetitive. Perhaps there is no way to escape that reality.

I often think of God watching down on us as we discuss, argue, and sometimes trample over one another in the pursuit of the most godly (or God-less) form of government. Watching conversations unfold via social media, it sometimes appears safe to converse with those whom one agrees, only. From the perspective of all eternity where one day is as a thousand years and a thousand years as one day, knowing every country, continent, town, city-state and province there ever was and ever will be, does He applaud our efforts? Gently smile and shake his head at us, his little  grasshoppers? Does He feel that us sorting it out, trying to make sense of our convictions, holding them, molding them, is of extraordinary moral consequence? Will he punish us for our vote in what is truly a polarizing two party system in the country in which we live? Or is He ever mindful that we are but dust, and we are doing the best we can to vote (or not) according to the views we hold from our limited vantage point?

As I avoid the voting booth today, not because I don't care or recognize our right to vote as an enormous privilege, but because I truly don't know what is best for our country in this day and age, I pray God is merciful to those like me. Ones that have ever shifting ideals as new information is absorbed. Those who view this life we've been given as a tangled, complex web, difficult to navigate with a huge level of clear cut certainty or rigidity. To those that feel that to every rule there is an exception, for every exception a rule. I see both (and if we are honest, we know there are only truly two who have the capability to win a Presidential election) sides having beneficial and negative consequence. Each in favor of decisions that will assist some while hurting others. Who holds the key to the greatest good for our future? I honestly have not the foggiest idea. My Bible has neither a donkey nor an elephant on the cover.

So tonight, I will stand by and watch. Thankful that we live in the messy beauty of a democracy. That we are free to voice our opinions, to bicker, to discuss, to argue, to cast our vote, or to choose not to....

May the best man win according to God's ultimate and divine purposes.
Although it may sound trite, torn as I am about this particular election, I unambivalently await my true King.




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