Family photo 2013

Family photo 2013

Monday, March 18, 2013

Spring is *almost* in the air.

Summer is my favorite time of year. By far. I've said it a million times, because it's true - you can't beat a Colorado summer. Tons of sunshine but not usually unbearably hot. Low to no humidity makes that yucky "sticky feel" blessedly absent. Few bugs. Gloriousness all around. It is always welcome in my book. I could marry Summertime and live happily ever after forever more never wishing to encounter another flake of snow falling from the sky the way it does on the prairie - sideways - in a white and windy blur. (Sorry skiers, I know. What a terrible thing to say!) Seeing as I've already entered wedded bliss and polygamy is still illegal no matter what those Sister Wives say, I will have to take it as it comes around, once a year, for a short, but sublime spell.

And yet as it approaches, a heaviness sets in. It's that ever present issue of elusive time that haunts me. Not because I'm aging, but because my kids are. While we work toward the closing of another school year and the beginning of warm, then hot days, filled with water and sunscreen and fresh air, I am again reminded of just how quickly it is all breezing by. Another year, another grade, gone....

Seriously, it seems no matter how hard I try, I can't get a handle on accepting it. It is forever escaping my grip, falling through my fingers that want so desperately to hold on. As much as I work to savor every season of their lives and truly enjoy witnessing them grow and change and mature because I love to see the people they are becoming, I never, ever feel ready for the next stage because I don't want to leave the last. Although I realize it as natural and hopelessly inevitable, saying goodbye to yesterday is hard.

Motherhood has completely wrecked me.

A note I wrote to myself last night as a reminder I would see when I woke up this morning. Because despite my longing to hang tight and seize the fleeting moments, I still wake up tired and grumpy, hoping to seize nothing more than my coffee cup and an extra large bowl of tranquility.

The strange unrest of living a dichotomy....
I.   just.    can't.    say.    no.    to.    this.    face. 
Basketball season is over - recognition ceremony is tonight. Oh, how I have enjoyed watching them all this year! The Saturday games, although hectic (we usually have our 2 little friends we babysit on weekends with us, making for a party of 11) have been a highlight of this winter for me. Such fun to see these kids play and advance in skill and ability! Such fun to sit on the side with my honey love and cheer! The two of us laugh. And smile. A lot. Good times all around.
Jayla was the only girl on her team and she hung in there with the big boys like a CHAMP! I am so completely proud.
Jayla found a Saint Patrick's cookie recipe on Pinterest she wanted to try. She's a much better pinner than I and she LOVES to bake. She's got that crafty pinning gene I am sorely lacking. Even my (yes, quite manly) husband has his own account that sees more activity than mine! Artsy people all around me, decorating life, making it more beautiful....
Not to be left out, I did Pay my respects to Saint Patrick with rainbow pancakes for breakfast and corn beef & cabbage for supper.
He.    can.    not.    say.    no.   to.   her.   either.
Even when she wants to perform "surgery" on him, which winds up looking like this...
Time to go soak in this gift of  today. ♥

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't believe you would trade me in for WARMTH. I know I pale in comparison to the Summer season, but you always HEAT me up!!!!
Those kids are so lucky to be attached to you. Effort is what makes normal people great.
Love,
BD

Cassie said...

what IS it about those babies?!?! saying no to ayla is killer as well.

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